I read an article not long ago about four being the perfect number of children to have. I agree! A matched set, or two of each. The article reasoned that once a mother had four children, there were certain things she just had to let go. Therefore, in the face of non-possible perfection, the mother of four was more relaxed. True enough!
I could add a few things to that.
Four means there is always someone to play with.
Four means the parental spotlight spreads wide and becomes, by definition, muted. There is less pressure, on all six of us, to perform. As parents, as children, as people. I used to be uptight. Slightly perfectionist. Yeah, four kids took care of that.
Four means we get charged extra. For everything. Campsites, cars (must have six seats!), restaurants…it all costs more.
But I don’t mind. Really. For every night we don’t go out, there are laughs–and drama– to be had at home. And extra kisses, and homede birthday cards, and more I love you’s. There are plenty of people to help with chores. And to make the mess, of course. We never lack for something to do. Life isn’t boring…and it has so much value.
That’s why we had four, really. I thought about a dozen, then a half, but I just hated puking for nine months straight. And my husband was starting to get that deer-in-the-headlights look.
But we had four because we value life. More than money, more than career, more than anything. Because one says, I like my life the way it is. And two says, I like to be “normal.” Three says maybe that last one was a surprise, or a moment of weakness. 🙂 Four though, four says I value family. I value you. At least, that’s what it says for me. It says I have hope.
Maybe when they bring me four husbands, and a dozen grandchildren, I’ll wish I stuck to one, or maybe two. I do worry about fitting them all around the dining room table, someday.
I never could have imagined this, my glorious precious home life, when I was one of the previous dozen girls I have been, just as surely the mother I am today cannot even dream of the days to come. They are beyond MY imagination.
I will enjoy the here and now.
Art by Amy